All of us probably have someone we hold dear in our lives. It could be a spouse, a child, a parent, a sibling, a boyfriend or girlfriend, a friend. We know instinctively that we love them. And that’s wonderful! We are made to love after all. The problem is why is it we often get hurt in the process? In fact, many people who love so deeply are the ones who get so hurt badly. Why?
I think what happens is this – we use our time, money and effort to make someone feel loved and special, expecting them to love us back, and when they don’t, we get disappointed and sad, sometimes even angry that they didn’t return the feelings and the things we did for them. It’s quite natural to feel this way, but in my opinion, it’s something we should refrain from doing.
We should not just love for the sake of us wanting to be loved, too. That would a selfish reason to love.
As it is written…
Luke 6:32-36 World English Bible (WEB)
If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to those from whom you hope to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to receive back as much. But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing back; and your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High; for he is kind toward the unthankful and evil.
“Therefore be merciful,
even as your Father is also merciful.
A true believer in Christ loves because he truly cares for the other person’s welfare. He loves because God loves him and God’s love is so great that it overflows and he cannot help but pass it on to others. He loves because he knows that God is in each one of us and he would like to serve and love God through them while he is here on earth. He loves because he wants to draw people to God and not unto himself. A true Christian loves whether he would be loved back or not. It is enough for him to love because God loves him and he loves God and he wants to bring others to God so that they too can experience His love.
With this kind of love, no money, no time, no effort is ever being wasted because everything is done for God, not for oneself. With this kind of love, we can be sure that the things we do for other people’s sake are not just things that would make them happy, but things that are good for them. With this kind of love, we draw them closer to God, for it is not ourselves we hope they would see, but God’s love moving through us. That is what Christian love is all about.